Hanging In There

February in Amsterdam is always the hardest month. It's very wet, and very cold, and very grey. January and February always feel like 18 weeks, not 8. And never more than this year without cafes, shops and friends' houses to break up the monotony of grey days. We have a week of snow predicted for next week, which Cal is incredibly excited about, and then hopefully after that it's daffodils, longer days and vaccines.

As I write this (if we're lucky) today will be the last day of homeschooling. Kids go back on Monday after months of lockdown 2.0. We've been so grateful that Stella could stay at creche this time around due to her speech delay making her an 'at risk' case. Even still Cal, David and I are staggering towards the finish line. Our nerves are frayed and we're all looking forward to a bit of space and the chance to miss one another again. It's not natural for a family of four to spend a year together in an apartment of 115 square meters. Understatement.

And I'm taking a break from work for a couple weeks to try and hit re-start. And in this time I'm challenging myself to do nothing. After a year of panic mode = high, it's hard to slow down and feel ok with stillness and calm. In the meantime I make lists of museums and cafes in Amsterdam I want to take the kids to, restaurants I want to visit with David, and trips we're going to take.. this year. Surfing in France, Asia for Christmas...Could it be true?